all who are thirsty on wednesdays

So, when we first thought of conversation partners and wrote them out last week, I was very worried about how my relationships with the people I had chosen would be affected. Having chosen my best friend from middle school, Ho-Young, whom I haven’t seen in almost 5 years and with whom I haven’t been staying in constant contact, I was worried about how she would react to my attempts at reconnecting. We got in touch again via Skype at the beginning of last semester, and although I was happy to see her I was also very caught up in missing my old life in Paraguay and feeling lonely and homesick (at that point hadn’t had a revival of my love for God yet) and so when I started bringing up my involvement and attendance at Living Water over the past couple months I think I put Ho-Young on the skeptical fence and remind her of the hardest part of our friendship years ago when we disagreed on God’s involvement in fortune and grace. I was just talking to her earlier on gmail and was just rambling about the China mission that I might have come across as too forceful or enthusiastic, because she outright told me she was not interested in the topic of Christianity at all.

I’m feeling pretty discouraged right now, which I know is due to my own lack of confidence in evangelism, but please pray I don’t lose hope or forget to trust in God’s involvement and timing. I’m meeting my dad tomorrow night for dinner for the first time in a month before going home for Spring Break, and he’s very skeptical of my involvement in church and the China mission and I’m very fearful he’ll be closed off (he and my mother and brother are also my conversation partners as intellectual/complacent believers). I don’t want to use my mumbling words to get across, but rather have the Lord speak through me, that my family and friends back home I’m planning on speaking to might truly understand. I try to tell myself it’s OK even if they shut me out, as long as they hear the Word, but I know I’m weak enough to crave their acceptance and allow myself to be molded by their ideals, which I don’t want to succumb to and grow complacent again. If you guys could just keep me in thought/prayer for confidence and boldness through the Spirit this coming decisive week, I would be so thankful!

-Elena <3